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When to Push and When to Pause: Finding the Right Balance*

  • Writer: Glenda Carnate
    Glenda Carnate
  • Mar 28
  • 2 min read

Support means knowing when to encourage and when to pause.
Support means knowing when to encourage and when to pause.

Supporting an autistic child or adult is a delicate balance between encouragement and respect for their limits. Growth happens when challenges are manageable, but pushing too hard can lead to stress and shutdowns. Learning when to step forward and back is key to building confidence and resilience.


Knowing When to Encourage


Encouragement is important when a person is capable but hesitant. They may need reassurance, structure, or time to process before stepping outside their comfort zone. Some signs it’s time to gently push include:


  • They show curiosity but seem unsure.

  • They engage with some frustration but keep trying.

  • They’ve made progress with similar challenges before.

  • The task is difficult but within reach with support.


Breaking the challenge into smaller steps, using positive reinforcement, and allowing flexibility can help build confidence without overwhelming them.


Recognizing When to Pause


There are times when taking a step back is the best option. Signs that someone may need a break include:


Pausing doesn’t mean giving up—it’s about allowing time to recharge. Stepping away from a challenge can provide space for self-regulation, reduce frustration, and improve readiness to try again later.


Finding the Right Rhythm


Growth isn’t a straight path, and progress looks different for everyone. By observing, listening, and adjusting expectations, you can provide safe and empowering support. Knowing when to push and when to pause creates an environment where learning is both effective and respectful.


Want more resources? Download the One Autism Health app for free!


*Results may vary; please consult a professional.

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